“Attempting Suicide: Chapter 25” of “Saving Destiny”

I am so excited to share with you that on Saturday, December 3rd, 2022 I will be hosting another event. I will be reading “Attempting Suicide: Chapter 25” of “Saving Destiny.” In “Attempting Suicide” Destiny is losing her will to fight.  Most of her time is spent in the Quiet Room being pinned face down in a restraint. The night starts off with them handing her a laminated card. The card says,, “We understand you are struggling a lot now. We care about you, but we will not interact with you until your behavior comes under control. You must also finish your Quiet Room time first.”

Attempting Suicide To Escape a Life Not Worth Living

If the card wasn’t laminated Destiny would have ripped it to shreds. The staff then sits in the doorway. They refuse to even make eye contact with her. Destiny sits in the empty room with just her weighted blanket. That and a vacuum of voices she can’t discern from reality. The voices are howling in her ears. Attempting suicide crosses through her head multiple times.

Because Destiny has no input from the right reality, it’s impossible to tease apart what’s real and what’s not. This makes it so that she can’t stay in control of herself.

Most nights she is kept confined to the Quiet Room until she is given a PRN dose of Haldol. The nurse puts it through her GJ tube. Then she she falls asleep rolled up in the weighted blanket. Staff wakes her up at shift change to go to bed in her room. To Destiny, it does not feel like a life worth living.

The Back Up Plan

When she expresses to staff that she is having thoughts of attempting suicide. They don’t take her seriously. Instead, they just write her up as looking for attention.

As her six-month treatment planning meeting gets closer and closer Destiny makes up her mind.  If the meeting doesn’t go well, she has a backup plan.

Destiny has been squirreling away money from her lockbox for the last couple of weeks. She also nabbed a tube feeding string and a pill crusher from the nurse’s office. Her plan is to run away from the school building where there is less supervision. She would take the money, tube feeding syringe, and pill crusher. Then she would go to the CVS downtown and buy a bottle of Asprin and a bottle of water. She would crush up the Aspirin, mix it with the water and push it through her J tube. Then she would wait too be rescued from this life that was turning out to be too painful to live.

To find out if Destiny really goes through with her plan of attempting suicide you will have to stay tuned.